21 Aug

We walk by Faith, not by sight. – 2 Corinthians 5:7

We often lose patience with God. We often hear ourselves complain, why me God? Why not now? Why this? We never understand why what we prayed so hard for is never given to us or worse the exact opposite happens or even what you have little off is taken away from you. We all have been through that emotion. Even a saint or a minister is not spared.

I was one of you. Who cursed the heaven above to have a personal grudge against me. I had a theory I would like to share. But let me make this absolutely clear, this was what I believed before God openedd my heart and worked in me. So as ashamed I am to state this now, I believed that God took away the one thing you love the most and you know you can’t live without to create a need. A need for Him in your life. Now think logically, when do we seek God, when we are troubled and when are we truely troubled, when something near and dear to us is taken away. I held that belief for so long and everytime I lost somone to Him, I would look up and mentally make a note: God – 5, Susan – 0. But I realised how wrong I was. God is not my enemy, He loves me and He is the one who created me, nurtured me and looked after me for so long. I am apologetic to even make the above point, but I know there maybe a few more like me who are still entertaining these thoughts and I wanna help them to stop and not make the same mistake I made. I kept the best thing of my life away from me for so long. Today I have found Him and I will never let Him go. My attempt is for each one to feel this love, fulfillment and happiness that I have been blessed with. And I would still be akin to it had not Lord streched out His loving hand to lift me up and embrace me.

Three months ago I put my weapons down and stoped fighting God. I read the Scriptures daily and knew the reason I was not truely happy all these years. I am not saying I was not happy, but let see hmm ya- I discovered the true meaning of bliss. Thats the word-Bliss. In God you not only happy and content but an alternate sense of bliss. I am digressing, I must warn you I do that a lot. So coming back. Imagine if all those incidents I prayed for did take place, all those people still existed in my life, would I be where I am today? Would I be in constant wake and presence of my God? I am guessing not. I may yet not be able to comprehend why things and future shaped the way it did, but then who am I to question Fate?

I am convinced today that God has a blueprint for all of us. He is the only one who knows what happens next. But then you ask me what purpose do we have, if everything is done anyway by God’s will why should I even try? I am glad you thinking this way atleast you have accepted that God and not you are in control. So to answer, each one of us have a choice. Every path we tread on has two roads, one which is right but difficult and other which seems easy but wrong. Now if you have chosen the later once too many times in your life then its about time you realized, you have kept God away for too long and its time to seek Him. So you see, a person who has God at his center will never choose the later. So you see how each factor is related to the other. Your part is to only accept that you need Him in your life, rest will fall in place.

I understand having faith is not easy. I know even submitting to Lord completely is hard. I am a regular person, but yet in His reign I feel like I am unique and most special. Thats the power of faith. I know that nothing but the best is in store for me. And if what seems like the best now does not happen for you then you must know that you were wrong, this was not the best to begin with. I am a regular person, I have sensed fear and pain, cried endlessly and thought things would never look good for me again. I had lost my faith, my hope, my happiness. But I did the best thing I knew how to do, closed my eyes and prayed. Prayed for Him to lift me up and restore my faith. I know a practical person may scoff this off ( I did too once, so trust me when i say this) but God will show you His will. It may be through the simplest of the things. In my case I had subscribed to these daily bible verses and each day the verse told me to hold on, be strong and that things will get fine, I just need to have my faith and I would smile and feel stronger. I would survive a day longer. Two things you need to understand – God works at His own pace and He will give only what is best for you. So be patient and have faith. He has never given up on you and never will, the least one can expect is that you wait and have faith.

So if the next time you see a bend, trust Him to make it straight. If you see a bump ahead, trust Him to make it smooth. If you can’t see the end, trust Him to guide you through. I will leave you with a thought by Charles Swindoll – ‘More often than not, when something looks like its the absolute end, it is really the beginning.’ ( In my next post I will elaborate on this thought)


2 Responses to “FAITH..”

  1. anujasinghal August 21, 2010 at 6:17 PM #

    That’s a beautiful thought, Susan. But as usual, I have something to say to it 🙂
    I am not a very religious person, but that doesn’t mean I have no faith. And like how your faith lies in this concept of your ‘God’, for’s more about my dreams. I now what ur thinking, “thr goes Anuja’s practical talk again!” But this is as far from practicality as it may get…someday…we’ll talk about it over a cup of coffee 🙂

    For now, I am happy that you have found your bliss. Call it faith, Call it God. All that really matters is that you found it and really congratulate urself…coz I think more than half the world is still struggling with their mid-life crisis! Cheers!

    • susankutar August 21, 2010 at 6:35 PM #

      Anuja, as usual I love a little disagreement. it jus means my point is worth arguing about. Thank you Anuja you have given me one more point to think about, Whether God and Religion are synonymn or is one related to another or unrelated? Hmm.. Well coming to the fact that you have faith in your dreams and not God. Can I ask you who realizes your dreams? Who has the strength to make o break them? And who made you capable enough to dream?

      I am not discounting your point. Each one is entitled to their opinion and I was one of you for so long. Today being on the other side, makes me look at things more neutrally and clearly. Indeed I would love talkin about this over coffee atleast a pleasent change from the usual boys, clothes and movie topics.. I truely appreciate your comments so keep it coming…

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